How To Deal With Divorce For Indian Mothers And Women

Divorce is not a common occurrence in India. And it is rarer still for mothers who have already had at least one child. For a mother who is divorced and working, the trauma of divorce can last for many years. Pointed remarks, judgmental stares, and labels prompting social stigma, can make it difficult to move forward in life. Not only does a divorced mother have to gain a new social standing for herself, but she has to face the serious problem of social alienation and unsure finances, which is known to be especially common in the Indian culture.Here is some advice for mothers trying to deal with divorce, and settle in a life worth living and being happy for:Financial issuesIt is always tough to break the usual cycle of using her husband’s income to support the child and herself, but this must be replaced with financial independence. Surveys have shown that only one third of Indian women who get divorced are able to retain their pre-divorce standard of living. Such a steep drop is bound to hinder lifestyle, career-centered thinking, and generally evokes a feeling of being incapable of handling things. This should not discourage women from learning and building an independent financial future for herself and any children.Women who are working shouldn’t delegate the important responsibility of handling finances to other people. For instance – investing in schemes, paying income tax, etc. should not be left for the husband to look after, instead they should show a keen interest in seeing their hard earned money through – watching it reap benefits, or falter with losses.Handling loneliness and anger problemsIndian women are known to be very dependent on their husbands for taking most decisions. Ways to solve these issues are by talking to friends, spending time with family members, and seeking the help of a professional if necessary. The chances of a divorced women being accepted back into society comfortably, to this day, is still bleak. It’s best to involve oneself in social functions and develop interest in recreational activities. Doing so gradually and steadily is advisable.ParentingIt is quite normal for divorced mothers to be confused. However, this very confusion can be disastrous for her child’s upbringing.Schedules that get disrupted, unbalanced decisions and family issues that are left unsettled, can lead any child into believing the attitude of getting away is acceptable.If the ex-husband has visitation rights, it is best not to discourage it. It is important to remember that the visitation rights are for the child. Children are better off with both parents, irrespective of how it impacts a woman emotionally. From a child’s innocent perceptive and for his/her benefit, that is a matter of fact. This by no means implies that women should allow their former spouses to dominant any part of their lives.Dealing with divorce is an excruciating experience for mothers in India, with degraded financial support and higher responsibilities. Professional divorce counseling can also be helpful in overcoming post-divorce difficulties. These are some issues to keep in mind when putting together a life after divorce, and Indian women are best advised to begin gaining their independence within the marriage, rather than starting late when the vows are no longer pertinent.

» Tags:

Comments are closed.